With hindsight a bad move to let the butler have this weekend off!

Tis that time of year I suppose. A change in the weather and thoughts that Winter will soon be upon us seems to bring out the bugs. I’m pretty lucky really when it comes to health so one can’t complain but (and you knew that was coming!) you’d have thought that in this day and age that someone might have come up with a cure for the common cold!

It started Thursday with the inkling of a sore throat. By Friday or so, I thought, it’ll have become the snotty cold which, although annoying can be coped with with Vic and lorry loads of Kleenex! But oh no, razor blades had slashed my throat and swallowing was excruciating. Onwards and upwards and off to work I went with a selection of medicinal sweeties. Only non verbal communication was possible by now but off I went to pre trip the truck for a return trip to Heathrow from Stansted.

Having made it to Heathrow I climbed down and nearly ended up in a heap. My limbs had become so heavy I felt someone must have turned up the gravity! If I’d been still flying there’d have been standby crew on call to take my place but not now. The thought of driving back along the M25 in Friday afternoon traffic did not fill me with great joy.

I phoned ‘the office’ to warn them I’d be fit for nothing else that day and set off. By the time I arrived back at base it was all I could do to back the truck on the bay. Men have a marvellously blunt way stating the obvious sometimes; “You look like s**t, go home!”. So I did and straight to bed.

Saturday and my head was thick with cold. The sore throat had gone thank God but the heaviness and total lack of energy remained. I live on my own (well if we are talking fellow human beings here. I do share my abode with six rodents in the form of guinea pigs) and it is times like these that it would be rather nice to have a butler. Someone to brew the hot toddies, mop one’s fevered brow and produce wholesome broths to keep one’s strength up. It would be reassuring to know that when one finally emerged from one’s sick bed that the ever increasing pile of ironing was now done, the bathroom cleaned, the house hoovered and dusted, the grass cut, the weeds weeded, the freezer full of tasty homemade ready meals for the convalescence period and the invoices sent! Why did I let Jeeves have this weekend off!


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